I wish I knew the order of the universe. I mean, do I expect the worst and get it??? I think and act with positivity but the cloud that seems to follow me around just won't let me be happy. In the last 2 years I lost my mom, her illness took any money I had saved, my husband became a computer addict with his internet "business", now is a gaming addict with Evony, he hasn't had any income for 18 months, collects unemployment as if that's his income, and sits in front of the computer 10-14 hours a day. (and that includes holidays, birthdays, everyday) Now he gets text messages in the morning from his "alliance" giving him information about when to attack...really what's that all about??
Why does the order of the universe seem reversed to me. This is my universe??? NO, this is HIS universe and I enable him and share the sickness with him. No wonder nothing good ever happens to me...I expect the worst, obsess on the worst and live for the despair!
I need to find Balance...what is the right Balance?